This is just sort of a vent.

I LOVE dressing decora(and Fruits, visual kei, etc).

But lately, I've felt like I don't want people to view me differently. I used to be addicted to the stares I got from people, and I liked the way they reacted.

But then, I think I had a complex about driving people away, and I don't want to do that anymore. but I love the style. it's so cute.

I always feel like people think I'm a stupid teenager, trying too hard to be different, and I'm really not.

I feel like the way I dress is causing potential love interests to stay away from me, and causing me to be forever alone.

But I don't want to stop dressing how I want, and I don't plan to.

TT.TT I don't know, could someone encourage me?

aw, hun, the only people you drive away are people you don't wanna be friends with anyway. Im sure if you went to a con instead you would find lots of people just like you and who appreciate you just for the person you are.

Appearence is such a small piece in life. If people don't wanna be your friend and only base that upon you looks then they're really shallow and you shouldn't bother becoming friend with them anyway.

don't change your style becasue people want you to be different. just be you. and someone who appreciate you will find you. I'm sure <3 you just need to find a place where all the open minded people hang out <3

*hugs*

Sometimes its hard to overcome feelings like that. Trust me, I understand. I'm going to college this year as a Gothic Lolita and I'm actually a bit terrified that people will steer clear of me. 

I think the best plan of action to get past this is to just keep wearing what you love, but exceed people's expectations of you by being super friendly and polite to people. I know people are always pleasantly surprised when this girl in a frilly black dress approaches them with "pleases" and "thank yous". 

Just be yourself and the people who matter will see past the clothing to the real you.

I actually think it's a good thing that you've stoped relying on the looks people give you, it means you're maturing and you really not "a stupid teenager trying to dress as differently than possible." However, I also think that you shouldn't give up a style that you love so much just because of what other people think. Make sure to be nice to people, just like RoseMaiden said. Make sure to keep an open mind, someone asking about your outfit might actually be interested in the way you dress, and hey, you might even make a friend. If you're really all that concerened with how people think, you could always just tone down your style. But I consider that option more of a last choice thing. 

Also, consider where do you live. People tend to be more open minded in a big city than a suburb or small town. Granted, I don't know where you live so I don't know if that applies.

Lastly, if a "potential love intrest" is that bothered by the way you dress then they are not a worthy "potential love intrest" at all! The world is a big place, I think you can be with the person you love while wearing the clothes you love. 

That being said, I hopw you can keep rocking the style you love!

if they cant accept you the way you are then they dont DESERVE to be your potential love interest *huff*

I agree with everyone. You shouldn't care about the looks you get. Because if you like it and it's comfortable to you, then you shouldn't have to give it up. Part of growing up is realizing that people are different, and being yourself and enjoying the things you love without dealing with what others think is part of maturing. I'd say that if people can't accept something you love and let you be happy, then they don't really deserve to be your friends in the first place. *hugs* I think we all go through that stage in our lives.

I used my clothes to drive people away too. Granted, I wasn't a decora (I was...kind of an old school emo mixed with goth), but in my small town even the slightest bit of weird clothing made people stare. But even when I started to let more people in I never stopped wearing what I loved, and I found the love of my life who dressed the same as me. Now I have preppy mainstream popular kids who come up to me and tell me that I have the coolest clothes and that they would never have the guts to wear what I do.
So basically, don't let them get ya down with their stares. Maybe while they're staring they're secretly thinking how brave you are, or that you look cool, not weird. Don't stop wearing what you want no matter what. If people don't want to get to know you just because you dress different then those people are missing out.

"Giragira" (double take in Japanese) is something that I have always loved. My problem lies in trying not to be obsessed over it. I had a complex for a while that I needed to be the most "different" of everyone else. Now, I have finally been able to leave the house in jeans and a t-shirt with casual not-straight hair once in a while. It is a really nice feeling (^^;;) ♥

So, my idea is, mix it up as of the swithing, I mean, always wear what is in your mood ~~ (^o^) ♪ If you want to wear curly hair and a dress one day, or skinny jeans and big teased hair the next, you go ahead and do anything you like ~~♪
You know, through crazy style I have found people who love me for just that - and people who can still, unfazed, tell me they love me when I'm at my worst with a Rat'sNest hair and baggy clothes.
It goes both ways - extreme look and ultra-downtoned look - that has its ups and downs. The zen secret is finding a balance ♥♥
And, within that, finding the people who are up to the girl or guy beneath the skin. It's always the soul that makes the skin beautiful.

Loves xoxox ♥
{ B e r r i e ~ P O N }

the only advice i can give is DO NOT PAY ATTENTION!.. people are going to give you wierd looks because its not and english/ american fashion, its asian which where you live is strange to people who have never seen it and don't know about it. there not looking at you because you're 'a stupid teenager' they're looking at you because they're taking in what you're wearing because it is foriegn after all :)